155+ Best Soccer Pickup lines For Kids

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By Robert Brown

Best Soccer Pickup Lines can turn any conversation into a winning play, whether you’re flirting on the field or sliding into someone’s DMs. If you’ve ever wanted to impress a soccer fan with charm and humor, you’ve come to the right place. A clever line can break the ice, score some laughs, and maybe even lead to an unforgettable connection.

You don’t need to be a pro to deliver these Soccer Pickup lines like a champ. Whether you’re shooting your shot with a die-hard supporter or just having fun with soccer-themed wordplay, these Soccer Pickup lines will have you dribbling right into their heart. Let’s kick things off!

Classic Soccer Knee-Slappers

  • Why don’t soccer players like cookies? Because they might get too many dribbles!
  • What’s a soccer player’s favorite drink? Penal-tea!
  • Why did the soccer player take so long to eat dinner? Because he thought he couldn’t use his hands!
  • What do you call a soccer player who’s lost his stripes? A referee-less!
  • Why did the soccer ball feel rich? Because it had so many bills (cleats) kicking it!
  • What position do ghosts play in soccer? Ghoul-keeper!
  • Why don’t soccer players tell jokes during the game? They might crack up the pitch!
  • What did the soccer ball say to the goal post? Don’t worry, I’m just kicking it!
  • Why was the soccer field so wet? The players kept dribbling all over it!
  • What kind of tea do soccer referees like best? Penal-tea!
  • Why did the soccer player bring string to the game? To tie the score!
  • What’s a soccer player’s least favorite music? A referee’s whistle!
  • Why did the cookie go to the soccer game? He was a wafer!
  • What did the football say to the football player? I get a kick out of you!
  • Why don’t soccer players like math? Too many divisions!
  • What’s a goalkeeper’s favorite snack? Butterfingers!
  • Why was the soccer player excellent at gardening? He knew all about corner plants!
  • What do you call a soccer player who loves breakfast? A cereal striker!
  • What’s a referee’s favorite dessert? Yellow cake with chocolate cards!
  • Why did the soccer ball quit the team? It was tired of being kicked around!

Wordplay Winners

  • What’s a soccer player’s favorite animal? A goal-den retriever!
  • Where do soccer players go shopping? The corner store!
  • What do you call a soccer player with a sore throat? A hoarse striker!
  • Why are soccer stadiums always cool? They’re full of fans!
  • What do you call a soccer player who works at a bakery? A goal-maker!
  • Why did the soccer player bring a ladder to the game? He wanted to score higher!
  • What’s a soccer referee’s favorite candy? A sucker punch!
  • Why don’t soccer players like winter? Too many snow balls!
  • What do you call a soccer player who loves plants? A goal-den gardener!
  • Where do soccer players sleep? On pitch-lows!
  • What’s a soccer player’s favorite fruit? A goal-den delicious apple!
  • Why did the soccer player wear a tuxedo? He was going to a ball!
  • What do you call a soccer player who loves astronomy? A shooting star striker!
  • Why did the soccer ball go to the doctor? It needed some kicks!
  • What’s a soccer player’s favorite breakfast? Corn flakes with goal-d milk!
  • Why don’t soccer balls make good comedians? Their jokes always get kicked around!
  • What do you call a soccer player who loves baking? A goal-den brown baker!
  • What’s a soccer player’s favorite car? A Volkswagen Goal-f!
  • Why did the soccer player bring a ruler to the game? To measure the goal line!
  • What do you call a soccer player who loves fishing? A goal-den catch!
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Silly Soccer Situations

  • Coach: “Why are you late for practice?”
    Player: “I was dreaming I was playing in the World Cup!”
    Coach: “And that made you late?”
    Player: “Yeah, we went into extra time!”
  • Player 1: “Why did the soccer ball feel lonely?”
    Player 2: “Because it was kicked out of the game!”
  • Mom: “How was soccer practice?”
    Kid: “Great! I scored two goals!”
    Mom: “That’s wonderful!”
    Kid: “Yeah, but we lost 7-2…”
  • Coach: “What position do you want to play?”
    Player: “I want to be a bench warmer!”
    Coach: “Why?”
    Player: “Because I heard that’s where all the hot seats are!”
  • Why did the soccer player bring a microphone to the game?
    Because the coach told him to use his voice to defend!
  • What happened when the soccer player tried to eat on the field?
    The referee gave him a plate card!
  • Teacher: “Why didn’t you do your homework?”
    Student: “I was practicing my penalty kicks!”
    Teacher: “For three hours?”
    Student: “I kept missing the goal!”
  • Coach: “Why are you wearing a party hat during the game?”
    Player: “You said we needed to get our heads in the game!”
  • Why did the soccer player bring a compass to the game?
    To find the right direction to shoot!
  • What did the soccer ball say when it went on vacation?
    “I needed a kick back and relax!”

Goalkeeper Giggles

  • What’s a goalkeeper’s favorite weather? When it’s rainy, because they get to make saves for a rainy day!
  • Why don’t goalkeepers tell jokes? They always save the punchline!
  • What’s a goalkeeper’s favorite movie? The Matrix – they’re good at stopping everything!
  • Why did the goalkeeper bring glue to the game? To make sure they could stick to their position!
  • What’s a goalkeeper’s favorite song? “I Will Survive” by Gloria Gaynor!
  • Why don’t goalkeepers make good comedians? They keep blocking all the punchlines!
  • What’s a goalkeeper’s favorite subject? Geometry – they’re experts at angles!
  • Why did the goalkeeper bring a fishing net to the game? They heard there might be a catch!
  • What’s a goalkeeper’s favorite TV show? Save by the Bell!
  • What did the goalkeeper say to the goal post? “Thanks for always having my back!”
  • Why don’t goalkeepers like social media? Too many posts!
  • What’s a goalkeeper’s favorite place to eat? Save-way!
  • Why did the goalkeeper bring a dictionary to the game? To look up the definition of clean sheet!
  • What’s a goalkeeper’s favorite dance? The save-cha slide!
  • Why don’t goalkeepers like summer? Too many beach balls!
  • What’s a goalkeeper’s favorite book? “The Catcher in the Rye”!
  • Why did the goalkeeper bring a vacuum to the game? To keep a clean sheet!
  • What’s a goalkeeper’s favorite ice cream? Rocky Road – because they’re used to rough situations!
  • Why don’t goalkeepers like math? Too many net profits!
  • What’s a goalkeeper’s favorite holiday? Save-or treat!

Referee Riddles

  • What did the referee say when he went to the dentist? “Open wide, you’re getting a yellow card!”
  • Why do referees make great gardeners? They know how to draw the lines!
  • What’s a referee’s favorite breakfast? Whistle-stop waffles!
  • Why don’t referees tell jokes during the game? They might card themselves for misconduct!
  • What’s a referee’s favorite TV show? Law & Order!
  • Why did the referee bring a mirror to the game? To check for any reflections on the game!
  • What’s a referee’s favorite ice cream? Vanilla – because they like to keep things black and white!
  • Why don’t referees like puzzles? Too many corner pieces!
  • What’s a referee’s favorite restaurant? Red Card-en!
  • Why did the referee bring a calendar to the game? To keep track of extra time!
  • What’s a referee’s favorite subject? Rules and regulations!
  • Why don’t referees like music? Too many off-beat notes!
  • What’s a referee’s favorite cartoon? SpongeBob Yellow-Pants!
  • Why did the referee bring soap to the game? To clean up dirty plays!
  • What’s a referee’s favorite candy? Whistle pops!
  • Why don’t referees like jokes? They take everything too seriously!
  • What’s a referee’s favorite movie? The Card-inal!
  • Why did the referee bring a thermometer to the game? To check if any players were running hot!
  • What’s a referee’s favorite dance? The whistle stop!
  • Why don’t referees like art class? Too many drawn conclusions!
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Remember, these jokes are all about having fun and spreading laughter through the beautiful game. They’re perfect for lightening the mood during practice, breaking the ice at soccer camp, or just sharing a laugh with fellow soccer enthusiasts. So next time you’re on the pitch, kick around some of these jokes – they’re guaranteed to score big smiles!

Team Talk Teasers

  • What did one team say to the other team? “Nice to MEET your DEFEAT!”
  • Why don’t soccer teams like mysteries? Because they hate cliffhangers!
  • What’s a soccer team’s favorite TV show? Game of Throws!
  • Why did the soccer team bring a calculator to the game? To keep score!
  • What do you call a soccer team that loves sweets? The Candy Strikers!
  • Why don’t soccer teams like horror movies? Too many defensive screams!
  • What’s a soccer team’s favorite food? Pass-ta!
  • Why did the soccer team bring a map to the game? To find their way to victory!
  • What do you call a soccer team that loves music? The Rhythm Strikers!
  • Why don’t soccer teams like riddles? They’re tired of trying to solve defenses!
  • What’s a soccer team’s favorite subject? Physical Education-al!
  • Why did the soccer team bring a compass? To find their true north goal!
  • What do you call a soccer team that loves art? The Creative Strikers!
  • Why don’t soccer teams like math? Too many divisions!
  • What’s a soccer team’s favorite dessert? Victory cake!
  • Why did the soccer team bring a dictionary? To look up the meaning of victory!
  • What do you call a soccer team that loves science? The Experimental Strikers!
  • Why don’t soccer teams like history? Too many past defeats!
  • What’s a soccer team’s favorite movie? The Goal-father!
  • Why did the soccer team bring a clock? To time their victory dance!

World Cup Wisecracks

  • Why did the World Cup trophy go to therapy? It had too many handlers!
  • What’s the World Cup’s favorite music? Trophy and bass!
  • Why don’t World Cups like parties? Too many cup holders!
  • What’s the World Cup’s favorite movie? Lord of the Wins!
  • Why did the World Cup go to school? To get more degrees!
  • What’s the World Cup’s favorite food? Champion chips!
  • Why don’t World Cups like beaches? Too many sand kicks!
  • What’s the World Cup’s favorite book? The Victory Chronicles!
  • Why did the World Cup go to the gym? To stay in shape for the next tournament!
  • What’s the World Cup’s favorite TV show? Cup-tain America!
  • Why don’t World Cups like winter? Too many snow goals!
  • What’s the World Cup’s favorite subject? Trophy-nometry!
  • Why did the World Cup go to the doctor? It had cup fever!
  • What’s the World Cup’s favorite game? Hide and trophy!
  • Why don’t World Cups like summer? Too many hot shots!
  • What’s the World Cup’s favorite dance? The trophy trot!
  • Why did the World Cup go to the bank? To make a goal deposit!
  • What’s the World Cup’s favorite holiday? Trophy-giving Day!
  • Why don’t World Cups like spring? Too many season passes!
  • What’s the World Cup’s favorite sport? Trick question – it’s soccer!

Soccer Pickup lines Stadium Silliness

  • What did the stadium say to the soccer ball? “You take my breath away!”
  • Why don’t stadiums tell jokes? They’re afraid of crowd reactions!
  • What’s a stadium’s favorite food? Hot seats!
  • Why did the stadium go to the doctor? It had turf burn!
  • What’s a stadium’s favorite movie? Field of Dreams!
  • Why don’t stadiums like rain? Too many wet seats!
  • What’s a stadium’s favorite TV show? Pitch Perfect!
  • Why did the stadium go to school? To learn about field trips!
  • What’s a stadium’s favorite book? The Stand!
  • Why don’t stadiums like winter? Too many cold benches!
  • What’s a stadium’s favorite subject? Geometry – all those angles!
  • Why did the stadium go to the gym? To strengthen its support beams!
  • What’s a stadium’s favorite game? Musical chairs!
  • Why don’t stadiums like summer? Too many hot seats!
  • What’s a stadium’s favorite dance? The stadium shuffle!
  • Why did the stadium go to the bank? To make a seat deposit!
  • What’s a stadium’s favorite holiday? Ground-hog Day!
  • Why don’t stadiums like spring? Too many field days!
  • What’s a stadium’s favorite sport? Every sport – it’s not picky!
  • Why did the stadium go to therapy? It had support group issues!
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Soccer Equipment Escapades

  • Why did the soccer cleats go to the party? They heard it was going to be a ball!
  • What’s a soccer shin guard’s favorite movie? Protect-inator!
  • Why don’t soccer socks like jokes? They always get cold feet!
  • What’s a soccer jersey’s favorite food? Num-burritos!
  • Why did the soccer ball go to school? To get better at its kicks!
  • What’s a soccer goal’s favorite TV show? Net-flix!
  • Why don’t soccer cones like parties? They always get pushed around!
  • What’s a soccer whistle’s favorite book? The Sound and the Fury!
  • Why did the soccer flag go to the doctor? It had corner issues!
  • What’s a soccer scoreboard’s favorite subject? Math!
  • Why don’t soccer nets like jokes? They catch everything!
  • What’s a soccer field’s favorite food? Grass-fed anything!
  • Why did the soccer ball go to the gym? To work on its curves!
  • What’s a soccer pump’s favorite movie? Air Force One!
  • Why don’t soccer bags like parties? They’re always packed!
  • What’s a soccer bench’s favorite TV show? The Sit-sons!
  • Why did the soccer gloves go to school? To get a grip on things!
  • What’s a soccer water bottle’s favorite book? The Thirst Games!
  • Why don’t soccer corner flags like jokes? They’re always getting cornered!
  • What’s a soccer trophy’s favorite food? Winner winner chicken dinner!

Remember, these Soccer Pickup lines are all about having fun and spreading laughter through the beautiful game. They’re perfect for lightening the mood during practice, breaking the ice at soccer camp, or just sharing a laugh with fellow soccer enthusiasts. Whether you’re a player, coach, parent, or fan, these Soccer Pickup lines are sure to score big smiles with everyone in the soccer community!

Tips for Using These Soccer Pickup lines

  1. Use them as ice breakers at the start of practice
  2. Share them during water breaks to keep spirits high
  3. Include them in team newsletters or communications
  4. Use them to lighten the mood after a tough game
  5. Share them during team-building activities
  6. Add them to soccer party favors or celebration materials
  7. Use them to help nervous players relax before big games
  8. Include them in soccer camp activities
  9. Share them during team travel to away games
  10. Use them to make training exercises more fun

Remember, the goal of these Soccer Pickup lines is to make soccer more enjoyable for kids and help them develop a lifelong love for the beautiful game. Keep the atmosphere light, fun, and encouraging, and these Soccer Pickup lines will help create positive memories both on and off the field!

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